Heart of Montgomery

send me back home to the place in which I began
reminiscing about the time when my mind and heart were free
trusting in love as if it was the last option of life
having that sense of security,
knowing that my very being had constant protection from harm
little did I know that I would be in a whirlwind of mindless behavior
massacure of heartache driven to the edge by suicidal thoughts
who would have thought that love could possibly appear as this

excuse me if I may, but should not a woman be allowed to love?
it's funny how jealousy can seek in a man's heart as though it was a serpent
took a bite of the forbidden fruit and almost paid for it with my life

3am, the devil's hours

crying dark tears of a woman screaming for the love that she once knew
no support, no direction
just pieces of her old self scattered on the floor like broken glass
what is she to do when the man that she's always loved,
harsely tries to love her back?

the break up.

attempts of moving on, finding a new direction
being young, dumb, and in love
wanting a slow escape from the pain that was supposedly in my head
gave up the most precious because it was no longer cherished by my love

the virginity.

the thought of the escape recorded in the back of his mind
each man digging deep in my frame, causing me to mistake sex for love,
allowing him to become more upset because he wasn't the man I was sleeping with
but what exactly is there for a man to do,
only but to break the woman down to where her self-esteem was below the ground
feed her lies that eventually become the way she views herself
tell her that he loves her, only for her to experience nothing but the opposite
tell her that she's worthless
tell her that she's too ambitious
have her to call or text, but purposely never answer
play with her heart when she is completely serious about the love
make her cry then laugh about it
allow her to feel like the love from the beginning can be replaced,
but feed her emotional poison so that she can constantly be sick
plot the motive to impregnate her, so that her dreams can be placed on hold
choose every jealous action carefully, so that no other man would want her

the sick  mind of an obsessed man wanting a woman that had to let go

sitting in my room staring at the ceiling,
I crave for love
have already ran so many men out my life
because of the true mirror image of my heart left from the last man
although I can't truly call him a man, but a little boy

wonder why a woman cries to herself at night
because she is tired
tired of being lied to
tired of being cheated on
tired of facing life without a hero because these men don't truly know how to be one
tired of having to wait for that "prince charming"
when in fact he might be homosexual,
tired in general, because every woman deserves a strong chest to lay on

when it's all said and done
I'm alone but not lonely
as long as I still remember the Heart of Montgomery,
you won't ever have to worry about me being too in love,
let alone being in love at all....

Copyright© 2011
De'Shundra Gibson, All Rights Reserved